Bitter Sweet

My somewhat dreaded day has come. Dylan would be one today along with Gavin. I have been dreading this moment mostly because I feel like if Gavin is no longer a baby, then in some way we have moved on without Dylan. Don't get me wrong, it is a good thing that we have moved forward with our lives, it is just a hard obstacle to cross. I am sure there will be many as the years go on. I am surprisingly doing ok though.
We went to the cemetary this morning with balloons to send off to Dylan. Each person got to write on their balloon a message to Dylan. The kids enjoyed watching the balloons fly up for miles and miles.
It is special that their birthday will always be by memorial day because there are lots of beautiful flowers all over the cemetary.
It was a very nice morning.
Then we had a little party for Gavin. Can I just say that he is such a darling baby?! He brings the light right back into our home if ever we are sad, or mad, or whatever. That kid just makes me want to smile. He really is our rainbow after the storm. He loved his cake and opening presents. We did a little video of his first year. Some of the pictures and videos will be familiar.
All in all it has been a good day. I was stressed about it, but it turned out ok.